The Reality of Life

Today my mother's doctor called and told her she had cancer in her lymph nodes. The Reality of what life really means in settling slowly into my brain......After my mom told me, i goggled "Lymph Nodes and Breast Cancer"......
I remember when Doctor Schrader came into the hospital lobby to tell us my mother was out of surgery. Everything went well, and i have removed all the cancer. So your mother should leave the hospital cancer free, but there still is a 15% chance that cancer could be in the lymph nodes. 15% mmmm, well what happen to my moms 15%. That is how i feel, like she did not even have the 15% coming to her. So surgery # 2 will take place next Wednesday.
The hope now is to pray that no more lymph nodes have cancer, and maybe things will be good. It is funny, well not really. telling people mostly family and friends, that your mom did great, she is up and around and the Dr got all the cancer out, and then somewhere in there you slip that 15% in really quickly so no body hears. Then 2 days later your trying to explain, that the 15% did not really matter.
I'm feeling down in the dumps..... When i left my mothers house Friday night i cried, i cried cause i had felt that things would be ok, the worst was over.. :"surgery". But now there is uncertainty... I mean i know my mother will be ok..... But.......... There is always that BUT....
But what about the lymph nodes
But what about the cancer spreading
But what about the cervical cancer she got 2 years back
But what about Chemo
But what about Radiation
But what about surgery #2
But what about her getting sick
But what about her losing of hair
But what about remission, will it happen for her
And the list goes on and on and on.....
So many question, and it seems like so little time.....
I'm sitting and talking to 2 friends tonight, and about every crazy cancer story i have heard in the last 5 days. Women need to do 1, 2, or both things go to the OBGYN every year, get on the table, put your legs in the stirrups, and let the fucking doctor tell you that everything is ok, and do monthly breast exams. and/or get a fucking mammogram... It is that simple... Do it for your self first and then for your husband your children your family your friends who love you. AND FOR ALL THE WOMEN OUT THERE WHO DO NOT DO IT FOR THEMSELVES...........
The End